I officially got a phone call that our child support case has been referred to interstate.  What does this mean exactly?  From what I can tell, it is a very long, drawn out process that does not guarantee anything.

Our new case worker called to tell me the news.  She said with-in a few weeks I would receive an affidavit in the mail.  If I sign this, it means that DB (HJ’s father sperm donor) will not have access to our address.  He will know that we still live in Iowa, but that is it.  Once she receives the signed form, it will have to go before a Nevada judge and be approved.  This can take around 3 months to complete.  And, this part is not mandatory, but I WILL do it.  While I do not think DB would ever do anything, I would rather not have him know where we live.  What if his family/gf were to find out he has a son?  It might make him snap.

After that, I will have to fill out paperwork on my employment status, income, etc.  CS office will work with Nevada CS office to insure paperwork is getting complete.  Nevada has 60 days to file the paperwork.

About 6-8 months from the start of this process, DB will finally receive paperwork letting him know what is going on.  He then has 60 days to fill out the paperwork and get the support amount changed.

Then if he begins paying, nothing happens.  If he doesn’t the state of Nevada could find him in contempt of court.

Here are my thoughts:

-The process takes about a year.  I am guaranteed to not get any money until then.  Really?  Something seems wrong with that.

-Once the new amount is set, he only has to pay that amount.  All the back owed support is still due at some point in time.  Shouldn’t the Child Support Office enforce a payment plan on back owed support?  Making sure it is paid in a timely matter?

-He isn’t working.  He doesn’t need to.  His gf supports him.  If he doesn’t have a job, he doesn’t have to pay.
I wish all my bills magically disappeared if I stopped working.

-He mentioned he had sold his company back in Iowa.  Shouldn’t some of that money go to pay of his debt?  Why wasn’t that an option?

-WHY DOES THIS TAKE SO LONG?

-Why do I know things, like he owns  rental property, yet the state can’t figure that out?

Basically, the whole process just gets more and more frustrating.  He is oblivious to what is going on.  He has no responsibilities in this matter.

Does anyone have experience with interstate cases?  I could you some advice on how to handle everything!

 

7 Thoughts on “Interstate Child Support

  1. How frustrating! Yea I don’t have any experience with this but you really would think it would be easier. How hard is it to make someone live up to their responsibilities?! Good luck with it all honey xo

  2. I have had 10 years experience in this. All I can tell you is that it works no differently than if you live in the same state expect that you have on more state office’s red tape to go through. Anything your state wants to do has to go through a process of filing and then giving them 60 days to respond. If no response they then send a follow-up. So on and so on. I know that isn’t quite what you wanted to hear… But there is a bright side. Now he is held and 2 states laws for compliance. Unfortunately in my case no enforcement is really done. Until he owes 5k in arrears. At that point the request for a suspended license. I know they have requested with the IRS to with his refund but guess what he didn’t file. Like you he has nothing to do with my 10 year old and had children after her. It would be nice if the Child enforcement offices would realize. The needs of the child don’t just go away because they choose not to take care of them. I fell in to the same circumstance with the donor of my 2nd child too. (you would have thought I would have learned not to trust again) this time I didn’t even bother filing for support knowing: 1. I would never get it (he also has nothing to do with her either) 2. I kicked him out when I found out he was 10k behind to his other kids and was trying to live off me. I refuse to be involved with a man who regards his children as a debit than can ignore rather than a child who needs fed and clothed.

    • Ugh, I was warned it is a long process. Luckily (?), he already owes close to 18K, so hopefully they will enforce a bit more. Unfortunately, he does not work…nor does he want to…his gf pays for everything. I wish I made enough money so I could afford to have him just sign everything away!

      • If your like me signing way would be comfort knowing that if something happened to me she wouldn’t have to go some with someone she didnt know or even go to someone who spent years avoiding having a relationship with her. But Missouri no one can sign off unless someone else is willing to adopt. But I did find out that you can escalate the adoption process if

      • Oops.. If there has been no contact or support for more than (I think) 3 to 6 months.

        • I think here, there has to be someone willing to adopt. However, he signed away “custody”, which means he has no visitation rights. And he has never met (nor asked to meet) HJ. I also had a will made up that said who HJ would go to if I passed. A lawyer said a judge would look at all those things (and the fact that the dad wouldn’t want him) and grant custody to who is in the will.

        • Hopefully I am doing this right! The laws are so tricky.

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