I do.  And I love it.  It is a guilty pleasure.  It also isn’t really my fault.  It is not like I sit by my TV at the exact time the crappy shows are on to catch the newest episode.  The only time I actually watch TV is typically on a weekend, during HJ’s nap time, while I am cleaning, organizing, catching up on phone calls AND watching TV.   So I must have something on basically for “background noise”.

HJ typically naps around 12:30 or 1.  I walk to the living room, turn on the TV and the only thing on is a marathon show on E! or MTV.  This is how I get sucked in.  Suddenly, I am able to catch up on exactly what the Kardashian’s are doing, I know what life is like on the Jersey Shore or what 16-year-old got knocked up.  And I can watch five hours of it (well, not really, usually only 2, but it is on for 5 hours).

That is my skeleton in the closet.

I like crap TV.

Here are the shows I have fallen victim to:

Teen Mom (both 1 and 2)It’s just good TV (no, no it isn’t).  I can’t help but watch.  I know what it is like to be a single mom, but I was older.  I knew when the guy was crap, I had finished high school (and college) and I had a job.  It’s not that I like watching these girls struggle.  It is that I can relate to them.  I remember watching 16 and Pregnant (another addiction, but same people) and one of the new moms, Chelsea, received a text from her baby’s dad that said something along the lines of  “tell me how I can sign away this mistake”. OMG (yeah, the shows even make me talk like a teenager), it broke my heart.  I burst into tears.  And I know EXACTLY how that text felt.  I wanted to reach out and give her a hug and make her stay away from that awful boy (but she didn’t).

Jersey Shore-It makes me laugh.  The people on this show are absolutely ridiculous.  And hilarious.  I don’t know why they get such a bad rap.  They play jokes on each other, they drink together and they argue…they are living together after all.  And Snookie always has her friends backs, I would love to have her as a friend.  The guys are a little skanky for my taste, but ya know what?  Good for them.  Although they might all die of syphilis.

Keeping Up with the Kardashians and Kourtney and Whoever Take some Town (not the Khloe and Lamar one though, I don’t know why, but her baby talking voice annoys me)-Kourtney is seriously funny.  I want to be friends with her too.  Kourtney, Snookie and me…

Please tell me I am not the only one that gets sucked into bad tv?!?

Three years ago today, my sister’s family had been visiting me.  I gave them my bedroom (in my one bedroom apartment) and had spent the night on the couch.  I remember falling asleep that night and being unable to lay on my stomach because my chest hurt so much.  I didn’t think much about it.  Sure my period was late, but I had taken 4 pregnancy tests and gone to the doctor.  Everything and everyone said “not pregnant”.  The doctor mentioned that since I had just started taking birth control in January, that maybe my body was still adjusting.

I remember taking the dog on a walk after my visitors left.  I brought my phone with me to catch up with some friends.  One of my conversations was about planning our trip to Vegas.  We had picked a few weekends in April that worked for everyone and were going to get the tickets that week.

For some reason, I thought I should take another pregnancy test…you know, to reassure myself for the 6th time before planning a Vegas getaway.  

Later that night, I was watching Desperate Housewives.  During a commercial, I decided to take the test.  So, I went to the bathroom, peed on the stick and started to fold some laundry.  I was not concerned.  The doctor had said I was not pregnant, right?

While folding laundry, I glanced over at the stick on the bathroom counter.  Huh, that’s weird.  I could have sworn the box said one line, not pregnant, two lines pregnant.  This test showed one very distinct line and then another VERY faint line.

And then I panicked.

I called Rebecca.  I told her I just took a pregnancy test and I couldn’t read the results.  I asked if she could pick up another one and stop over.  I think I said this between gasping for air…

While waiting for Rebecca, I called my friend Courtney.  She answered and I quickly stammered out, “I’m fucking pregnant.”

I don’t remember her response, but I do know she said everything would be fine.  Meanwhile, Rebecca showed up with a double pack of tests and a Gatorade.  I ran to the bathroom, peed on the stick and stared at her for two minutes.  I told her to go look at it.  She came out of the bathroom and said, “It says the same thing.”

I remember being quite a mess.  Rebecca was unsure of what to do and when to leave.  I think I even had her in tears at one point.  I remember sitting on the floor in a pile of unfolded laundry.  I remember thinking holy shit, I am going to be a mom.

Then I remember thinking about Nate.  I was confused on where we stood at the moment.  Since we had dated, we had been inseparable, except for the past two weeks.  He had distanced himself.  Texting rarely, calling even more seldom.  We had hardly seen each other.  He had told me it was due to work, but I had a feeling it wasn’t.  I remember being at a hockey game with a friend and her saying, “Hate to say it, but I am glad he isn’t calling.  He is trash.  You needed to get him out of your system, on to the next.”

I remember thinking she was right.

But just that day he had actually called.  He had said he missed me and wanted to get together for dinner on Wednesday.  So where did we stand?  And now that I found out I was pregnant, what was going to happen?

I couldn’t help but think about a conversation we had a few months prior.  We were watching Juno and saying how our parents would react to the news of being pregnant.  He said he wouldn’t even tell his dad since they didn’t talk, but that we knows he would definitely be a better man than him.  That he would be a dad.  That we were at the age where our friends were having kids.

I remember that thought calming me a little bit.  But I was still freaking out.  Like I said, I didn’t really feel like we were even a couple at this point.  And I was pregnant.

Once again, I accepted the Pinterest Challenge from Young House Love and Bower Power.  The item I chose to make? Fish Scale Wall Art from Two Thirty-Five Designs.  The difference is that Two Thirty-Five Designs made a super huge Fish Scale Wall Art picture, and I made a teeny-tiny version.  I didn’t have quite the wall space apparently.  Also, at our house it is called the Dragon Scale picture  because fish gross me out.

I ran to the store and bought silver spray paint and a pack of ten poster boards (total cost, less than $5).  Once HJ was tucked in for the night, I started tracing circles onto the poster board.  The circle I traced was 2.5 inches across.  After I filled up one poster board, I figured I would cut them out and see how many more I needed.  I settled in front of the couch and watched a Jersey Shore marathon while cutting away (I can’t believe I just admitted that.  It was a Friday night, I swear there was nothing on.  Don’t Judge.).  After cutting out the circles, I got a piece of cardboard (from a diaper box) that was the same size as the frame I had in a closet.  I wanted the scales to overlap a bit, so I drew lines on the cardboard that were two inches apart.

Once all the lines were drawn, I started laying the circles on and stapling them on.  Yup, staple (also why it overlapped, to cover the staples).  Luckily, I only need one and a half poster boards to fill up the 11×14 frame…woohoo, my fingers were sore from cutting!

When all the circles were stapled on, I trimmed up the edges so they were even with the cardboard.  Then out to the garage where I spray painted the heck out of it until it was a glistening silver.  Side note: make sure the cardboard is all the same side up (glossy side or non glossy), the spray paint looks a bit different on each one…so I had to replace a few circles.

I let it try over night, then popped it into the frame and hung it in the entry way.  It was super easy, and it looks fun and unique (and under $5)!

I little over a month ago, I had the not so great idea of finger painting in the bath tub.  Mommy fail.  Recently, I had another idea that actually went over REALLY well. 

A few weeks ago HJ and I were bored with all the cold weather.  We were sick of playing with the same old toys.  We were even throwing fits about playing hide-and-go-seek.  We had to think of something new to do.  Our solution?  We laid a towel on the kitchen floor, set out various size plastic bowls and filled some up with water.

 

HJ thought it was great fun to “dump” water back and forth.

We also worked on colors with the bowls.  He was very careful about not spilling or splashing even though I thought for sure it was a mess just waiting to happen.

It was great to do something a little out of the ordinary and it kept HJ occupied for quite a while.

I have been putting off painting the playroom. I was having trouble picking out a color. At one time, I wanted to do a bright green, but thought I might get sick of it. At another point, I wanted to paint it white and put up some decals, but white seemed blah and boring.

Finally, I decided.  Tan.  WOOHOO exciting, yeah I know.  But I figure with all the wild colors we already have in there, something a bit muted would be better.  Plus, hopefully it can “grow with the room”, because I hate painting.

So here was the room “before”:

One night after HJ was tucked into bed, I taped off the room.  The next afternoon, during nap time, I started painting.  Now remember, things usually don’t go smoothly for me.  This was no exception. 

I moved all the toys, furniture and couch to the center of the room.  I then opened the window to help get rid of the “paint smell” and set the paint pan full of paint next to it.  I stepped out of the room to grab sheets to lay out.  I stepped out for only a split second.  That is when the dog poked his head in the door, saw the open window and bounced over to look outside.

His front two paws splashed into the paint pan as I shouted, “NO TY-TY!”.  My shouts scared him, which led him to fly across the room…over the couch.  So, spread throughout the room in a tan paint color were puppy paw prints (large puppy paw prints), as well as on the couch.  I tried pulling him out of the room while holding his back two legs.  This caused a little bit of paint to drip on the hallway carpet and in the mud room.  The paint also splattered onto my new handbag (which was hanging by the door) and got on my shoes.

Ugh.

I spent the next half hour scrubbing the carpets, the couch and my handbag, while the dog was whining from the garage.  Luckily, most of it came out (since the paint was still wet).  I did miss a drop in the hallway, but I am hoping it will wear off soon.  Also, it looks like I painted the dogs nails.

Nap time is only about an hour and a half, and I knew I had to be all cleaned up before HJ woke up, so this left me with just under 45 minutes to paint.  Needless to say, it did not get finished.  I spent my lunch hour the next few days finishing up.

 

Not much of a difference, you can see the contrast against the trim.  It does make the room feel “warmer” though, so I am happy with it!

I apologize for the lack of posting lately.  About a month ago, I woke up to what I thought was a pulled muscle in my chest.  After a week, I went to the doctor who affirmed it was just a pulled muscle and to not worry.  She also said if it got worse to come back in a month.  The next day I was in so much pain, I had a fever, everything hurt.  I went in to urgent Care where they gave me a prescription.  I felt a bit better, but not back to normal.  Once the meds ran out, my right breast started hurting again.  I went back to the doctor, had an ultrasound, and was put on a stronger antibiotic for mastitis.  Yes, apparently you can get that when you aren’t nursing.

The next day was worse.  I called the doctor in tears.  They said it would take another 24 hours for the drugs to take hold, she scheudled an appointment for 2 days, but she knew by then I would be better.  Well, the next day was worse.  I went in to another doctor for a second opinion.  With in minutes he confirmed that I had a lump in my breast.

I was sent up to a breast specialist who requested another ultrasound.  While waiting for the ultrasound, I texted my sister to come and be with me.  I was lucky that she dropped everything and drove the 2 hours to help me (my parents happened to be out-of-town last week).  While she driving, I had another ultrasound.  I could tell the ultrasound technician saw “something”.  She kept focusing on one area of my breast, typing and clicking buttons.  Of course, she wouldn’t tell me what was going on. 

My sister arrived while I was waiting for the results.  They did see a lump in the ultrasound and wanted to complete a biopsy. 

The next morning I had another appointment.  The doctor scheduled me for surgery for the coming week and said to wait it out.  Anyone who knows me also knows that I can not wait.  I have anxiety that goes through the roof.  After some discussion, it was decided that the biopsy would be done right then.  He did mention that with my infection it would hurt more than normal, but at least it would be done.

The next 24 hours were excruciating.  I was a mess.  The doctor assured me that 80% of the time, it is not cancer.  To me, 20% was still way to high.  Finally the call came in.  The biopsy came back benign.  Hopefully the infection is healing.  I go back in Wednesday.  They are hoping by then that I feel back to normal.  No soreness, no infection and best of all no cancer.

Like I said, it has been just over a month.  I fell like I haven’t been myself in a month.  It has been a month since I have been able to carry HJ on my right side.  A month of telling him to be careful because mommy has a “owie”.  Hopefully, life will soon be back to normal.

I hope to never have to deal with a scare like this again, and I hope none of you do either.  Remember, get yourself checked!!