Last week was crazy busy at work.  I also had a gift card to a local spa burning a hole in my pocket.  This led me to scheduling a facial!  I have never had a facial, but decided it sounded relaxing. 

Friday afternoon, I took off work early and went to the spa.  I was escorted to the back room and given a robe.  They told me to undress, put on the robe and come out.  Huh.  I thought they were just working on my face, so I was not ready to be in my birthday suit.  I stammered out a, “like naked?  All the way?  Totally undressed?”.  This apparently amused them.  I was then told I could leave my underwear on.  I one up’ed them and left my socks on too.  I walked back out into the spa lobby feeling not-so-chic in a fluffy robe and socks (maybe the socks should have been off).  I then waited 5 minutes (5 minutes!) in a robe and socks next to totally clothed women before being escorted to a room.

In the room, a nice person (I think it was Emily?) said, “I see you have been here before for a bikini wax.  This should be more relaxing.”

Well I should frikken hope so.

She then told me to hang my robe and get on the table.  I learned I would never make it as a nudist.  “Can’t I just wear the robe on under the blankets?”

She told me I might get hot and the oils would get on the robe.

I had no choice but to take off the robe.  She then cleaned my face and wrapped it in a hot towel.  She also let me choose an aroma for the facial…which none of them smelled like freshly baked cookies. 

Here is what I think happened…something got slathered on my face and wiped off 3 times.  Then, something was slathered on and I was wrapped in the hot towel while she rubbed my shoulders with some oil.  Then something else was put on my face and I was re-wrapped while she rubbed my hands.  She kept telling me to close my eyes, so I must have kept opening them, but I wanted to know what was going on.  I heard her yawn a few times, so she must have been bored.  I know I was.

When she was finished, I pranced back to the dressing room in my robe, socks and make-up free face.  I was hoping to look in the mirror and see a glowing skinned, wrinkle and blemish free face, but it really just looked like I was getting ready to go to bed.

I think I might be to much of a wired person to sit and relax for facials.  I felt self-conscious and awkward.  Am I weird or do other people feel to self-conscious to lay on a table naked while some chick rubs your face?

Ever since Ty was a little puppy, he has been obsessed with fetch.  It can go on for hours and hours, until I finally go crazy and hide the toy we were playing with.  HJ thinks it is a hilarious game.  He yells at the dog to GET IT!  And giggles uncontrollably when the dog slips and crashes while trying to make turns.

Two nights ago, HJ walks up to me with a dog toy and says “ME!”.  I had no clue what he was getting at it…”Throw it mommy!”…so I threw it.  You know who else likes playing fetch?  HJ.  He ran and got the dog toy, brought it back, and stuck his tongue out and panted.  Like Ty.  I found it a tad bit funny, so I threw it again.  Then the dog wanted in.  I was throwing a toy to my dog and child, they were racing around the house, dropping it at my feet and panting.

Sure, there were a few times where I thought I should stop.  That a child should not be playing fetch.  But then I would see HJ laughing and running, pretending to be a dog, and I would throw the toy again.

So yes, I play fetch with my child.  And that night was the best he slept in months.

My friends make comments to their children such as, “just wait until dad gets home” or “I get to be the good cop today”.  They will comment on how their child has a current favorite parent, which can change day-to-day.  Single parents don’t have the good cop/bad cop game to play.  There is just one cop.  I am sure there are some single parents who still have shared custody that can play the cop game, but for me, it’s just me ..the sole disciplinarian…and this is my blog.

Now that HJ is getting well into his terrible twos and beginning to be disciplined, I see how necessary the good cop/bad cop roles are.  There are times where I don’t feel like disciplining him.  Times where I just want to laugh.  In most houses this is probably where I could threaten them with the other parent.  For me, I just need to get the disciplining over with.  It is times like this where I want to be the “cool parent” and not the discipline-er.

I dislike putting HJ in time outs.  I hate seeing him cry.  And my heart broke a little when he told me I was a meanie.  To be honest, it made me a little envious of my friends who can pass off the disciplining and don’t always have to be the bad cop. 

I also get terrified that this means I am going to turn in to a pushover.  I find it hard to say no to HJ.  I try my best to hold my ground, but every now and again I cave.  Do any parents have advice on how to hold firm?  To not cave to a sweet little smile?  Any experiences with good cop/bad cop?

I’ve been tagged by Aryn at Living on a Dime or Less!
Here are the rules:
1. You must post the rules. (And link up who tagged you.)
2. Post eleven fun facts about yourself on the blog post.
3. Answer the questions the tagger set for you in their post, and then create eleven new questions to ask the people you’ve tagged.
4. Tag eleven people and link them on your post.
5. Let them know you’ve tagged them!
11 Facts About SingleMama
1. Before HJ, I use to make my dog a home-cooked dinner on Sundays.  Chicken, carrots, potatoes…the whole bit.
2. I was a blonde all thru college (maybe some day I will post a picture…but I didn’t have a digital camera at that time.
3. I can play ping-pong really well
4. I absolutely hate snakes.  Hate them.  All kinds.  Worms are just little snakes.
5. I can’t keep plants alive.  Recently, my boss rescued a plant form my office.  It is now his.
6. I love cupcakes.  Give me cupcakes over flowers any day.
7. Although, I love receiving flowers.
8. I still am unsure what I want to do with my life.
9. My son is my best friend.
10. I spent two summers living on the shore of Lake Michigan with 40 other interns from all over the world.
11. I don’t like seafood, but love sushi.  I know, huh?
 Answers to Aryn’s Questions1. Who is your favorite person in the world? Why?

My son!  He is hilarious, sweet and the cutest little lovebug ever.
2. If you could take an all expenses paid vacation anywhere in the world, where would it be?
Greece!  I have always wanted to go there, but it is an expensive lil trip.
3. If you could have the leading role in any major movie, which movie would it be?
I would be in Cars 4, so my son would think I was the coolest
4. What do you consider to be your biggest accomplishment so far in your life?
Sort of figuring out how to be a single mom.  It is not easy people.
5. What show/movie are you most embarrassed to admit that you love?
Teen Mom.  1 and 2.  Love it.
6. What is one goal that you have for 2012?
To have and maintain a budget.  January was a bust, hopefully it gets better.
7. If you were a superhero, which one would you be?

8. Name one thing that you cannot live without.
Chocolate.  Have to have sweets.
9. You’re going to the beach for the day but only have room in your bag for three things, what three items do you take?
Swimsuit (no nude beaches for me), towel, book
10. What is your best tip for living on a budget/living thrifty?
Crap.  I need advice on this one.  I can not shell out advice on this.
11. If you could spend endless amounts of money on one thing, what would it be?
I would love to spend endless amounts of money on gifts for people.  Not just people I know, but strangers.  Surprise them and be like, “Oh here, take this new jaguar.”

At daycare, HJ and all his little friends have decorated mailbozes in annticipation of Valentine’s Day.  Last week, he returned home with many hearts that said “Ella loves HJ”.  So his bag is all packed up for tomorrow, ready to share the love.  We have discussed how he will get to put one of his cute little valentines in each person’s mailbox.

His Valentine’s?  Super cute.  I had been looking on etsy and pinterest for inspiration.  That is when I realized to buy all the supplies to make it, I might as well just buy them off of etsy.  Plus, how much easier is that!?!

Here are his Valentine’s.  Cute, huh?  Plus, it has a car on it, which makes it super-manly.

Anyone have cute cards that they made?  Am I the only one who took the easy way out?

For the longest time after I had HJ, I would panic whenever my phone rang.  I would wonder if it was HJ’s dad calling to tell me how I ruined his life.  It was an awful feeling.

The feeling eventually went away.  HJ’s father and I have communicated only once every 5 months or so.  So when my cell phone rings, I don’t worry that it is him.  Then Tuesday rolled around.  I was updating some documents for work, snacking on peanut butter M&M’s, and my cell phone rang.  I glanced at the screen figuring I would ignore it (I was working!) and I panicked.  The name on the screen was Nate.

I took a deep breath and answered, knowing if I didn’t talk to him right away he wouldn’t call back or answer any of my calls.  Here is a little replay of our conversation..

Me: Hello?

Nate: Hey, How’s it going?

My thoughts…Oh are we making small chat here, what the hell?

Me: Er, fine.

Nate: That’s good.

Me: Uh-huh

Nate: So I am confused

My thoughts…no kidding.

Me: About?

Nate: My employer received a letter saying that child support recovery is going to be withholding child support.

My thoughts…big smile, oh my goodness, I might finally be able to get some support!

Nate: Why?

Me:Because you are supposed to pay child support?

Nate: But why is it a set amount?  I can’t afford that, can we change it?

Me: Did you contact the child support office?  I believe it is based on of a percentage of your income.

Nate: No, I thought I would call you first.  Can you call and see if it can be lowered?

My thoughts…HAHAHA.

Me:I think it is a pre-determined amount, plus they are probably factoring in back owed support.

Nate:So should we contact your lawyer again and have him draw something up?

Me: Why don’t we wait and see what is going on first?

Nate: OK.

Me: Sounds good!  Bye!

Nate: See ya.

First of all, he was a company owner when we dated.  Numerous times he would comment on the amount withheld from people’s checks for child support.  He KNOWS how the system works.  Secondly, NO I WILL NOT CALL THE CHILD SUPPORT OFFICE FOR YOU.  I am quite certain he is a capable adult who can handle calling them and figuring it out.  Most people know that amounts CAN be changed, but like I am going to freely give that information.  He can do some work on his own (but he won’t, he is lazy).  Thirdly, contact my lawyer to write a new amount?  MY lawyer?  Who was hired to help ME?  That sounds like a smart idea, get right on that.  And last of all…why does it still crush my heart that he does not even ask about HJ?  He did not bring him up, ask how he is doing, nothing.  When does that stop hurting?  Can someone truly be that heartless?

Hopefully, my phone ringing won’t be setting me into a panic again.  And hopefully HJ might actually start getting child support.