I know everything I have posted about HJ’s father has been showing my ugly side.  But, in light of HJ’s 2nd birthday tomorrow (HOLY CRAP!), I wanted to share with you something I wrote to HJ’s father after our first meeting at the lawyer’s

Nate-
Thank you!  Thank you for giving me the most amazing and wonderful thing in my life.  Harrison has made me such a better person.  I love being a mommy more than anything in the world :). It is amazing how unconditionally I love him and I thank you for that every day.  I know that it is not something you want, but know that you have given me the most incredible gift anyone could ever get.
I hope some day soon you will realize how precious your beautiful son is, I would hate for you to miss out on too much more of Harrison’s life.  His smile melts my heart and his laughter makes my day!  It was really hard to see you at the lawyers, because he looks so much like you.  I am doing my best to provide him with an amazing home and loving role models.
I understand if you feel like you went too long without telling anyone and I am fine with keeping it that way, but I do think you should consider swallowing your pride on this one.  You only have a first son once in a life time.  When I asked how you chose your daughter’s name, you said you didn’t get a say in it, but if it had been a boy it would have been a different story.  Clearly, that shows you realize how important a son is.
When I first told you that you didn’t have to be an involved parent, you said “I am a better man then that”.  I hope that you do decide to be a man and take a little responsibility for your actions.  Don’t let Harrison go through life being bitter towards his father.  You should know first hand how that can eat away at someone.
It broke my heart seeing how easily you signed off on Harrison.  I will never understand how you can choose one child over another.
It may seem I have some bitterness towards you, but know that part of me will always love you for giving me Harrison.  He truly is the best thing that has ever happened to me.
Kristin
HJ is and always will be the best thing to happen to me.

4 Thoughts on “The Thank You

  1. Makes me happy and sad at the same time. You are very brave for writing that, and hopefully HJ’s Dad will see the light before he misses too much. {hugs}

  2. I too hope he realizes what he has given up. But thankfully you were calm and reasoned enough to do the best thing for your son.

    But I couldn’t help but zero in on this part:
    “When I asked how you chose your daughter’s name, you said you didn’t get a say in it, but if it had been a boy it would have been a different story. Clearly, that shows you realize how important a son is.”
    Why would it have been different with a son? A child is a child. If he is the kind of person who values one gender over another, he really is a jackass and you are well rid of him!

  3. Kristin: I think the letter was great!! You were kind but firm and I think you were able to put aside the pain that he has inflicted on you and focused mainly on the fact that you now have a wonderful blessing in your life as a result of whatever the two of you shared. I hope that he recognizes his mistake and will at least make some attempts to be in HJ’s life. Regardless, I think you did a great job!!

  4. Pingback: The Thank You | Kids say :

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