I like to think I am a happy person. I have fun. Love playing with my little man. But I have a serious dislike.
Before dating HJ’s father, I loved going on dates. Heading out to a nice dinner and drinks, being wined and dined, getting dressed up and even putting on make up (GASP!). I was always dating, never anyone too seriously, just having fun. I went out with all types (I wasn’t even too picky). Figured I would give everyone a shot, and heck, a girl has to eat, right? From a doctor, a teacher, a lawyer, the penis enlargement sales man (seriously…), an architect, and the hot bartender (yeah, this list could go on and on). Then I met HJ’s father (I really hate calling him that since he was not ever done anything fatherly). I fell hard. I don’t know why. He didn’t seem so bad, but his friends were trash. My friends didn’t like hanging out with them. But for some reason, I loved it.
The next guy I dated was when HJ was almost 1. He seemed amazing. Everything I wanted…except, I wasn’t everything he wanted. I had a kid.
Which brings me to now. Dating sucks. It isn’t fun anymore. I don’t want to waste my time going out with some random guy if I don’t think there is potential there. I don’t want to play games anymore. And I definitely wouldn’t waste my time on anyone who I can’t see as a great role model for my son.
It makes so I don’t want to date. I am too picky. I feel like no one would want to date me because I am a single mom. I am not looking for pity, this is just honestly how I feel.