Father’s Day officially became difficult for me.  Last year wasn’t bad.  Maybe it was because I had just found out I was moving and felt crazy busy.  Or maybe it was because Hj and I were not around daddys that day.  But yesterday was hard.

We had gone out-of-town with some friends (and had a blast), but seeing how much Hj admired and loved the “dad” was heartbreaking.  He was following him around, sitting on his lap, laughing at everything he said and running around to give him hugs.  It was obvious how “cool” Hj thought he was.  And it was hard to watch someone be such an amazing father and know that Hj does not have that.

I wish I didn’t feel this way…like I have said before, Hj’s father would not be a good role model.  And he would be nothing like the people we were with this weekend.  It is just so heartbreaking because Hj deserves the best.  I just wish I could give it to him.


2 Thoughts on “Father’s Day

  1. I understand your feelings. I have ached watching my son be daddy-less all these years. Mainly when we are at events or gatherings did I feel this way but as your child grows it will become easier. I am not saying it goes away or that it’s ok – it’s not. But it is what it is and we have to role with the punches that have been thrown at us. Keep writing, keep talking and keep the faith/optimism.

  2. Pingback: The Year Father’s Day Became Better | A Slice of Mudpie

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